wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize