If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Randomize
