UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize
