WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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