Sry I called you an 8
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
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