I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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