Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Randomize
