How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
whose parrot is this?
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
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