Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize