We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I understand Curling. That high.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
