lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize