Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
