Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
