I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
