You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
