I just saw a hot homeless man
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize