i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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