I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
