peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
