Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
