I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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