Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
All the doctor said was why
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
