what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
