Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry smilesandsoap hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(619): View more from California

Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!

Fav 18 2102 983
share tweet
(401): View more from Rhode Island

dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM

(616): View more from Michigan

Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?

(401): View more from Rhode Island

wait... oh

Fav 9 3717 1200
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(705): View more from Ontario

i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole

Fav 27 976 7021
share tweet
(317): View more from Indiana

I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .

Fav 59 6979 994
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.

Fav 16 1389 6412
share tweet
(410): View more from Maryland

As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.

Fav 19 6295 1274
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(951): View more from California

Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.

Fav 31 7297 1728
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(913): View more from Kansas

Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?

Fav 7 1122 2046
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(651): View more from Minnesota

What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up

(612): View more from Minnesota

my bad i broke a mirror over your back

Fav 0 23 44
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT