spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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