Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Randomize
