Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Randomize