Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
