we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
