Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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