Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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