Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
