I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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