the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
