dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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