I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
