Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
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