On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Nicole vs. Life
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Randomize
