you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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