All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
