physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
