would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Success! We fucked roommates!
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
