My nipple is on Facebook.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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