I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
