Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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