Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
