i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize