"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
