Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she pinky promised me she was 18
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
