Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize