drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
