Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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